Dude, Do Not Get A Dell

The hard drive on my last laptop irretrievably melted down a couple weeks ago. Laptop gone, data gone (yeah, yeah, I know, I should have backed up). The laptop was a four year old Compaq Presario, the replacement hard drive was a two year installation from Best Buy pursuant to the extended warranty I got with the laptop. I could share what a miserable experience that was (it also involved a loss of data due to Best Buy), but I'll just let you infer from the two year lifespan of the replacement hard drive that Best Buy is also a place to avoid for anything but off-the-shelf, no-service-or-returns necessary purchases. That's not the point of the post though.

I decided to stick with a laptop for the next home computer for a variety of reasons, and I wanted a lightweight laptop at that because why have a laptop if you're never willing to lug it anywhere. On the other hand, I felt a little guilty about the extra cost involved, so I opted to go with a Dell Inspiron 700m.

I was concerned about a possibly cramped keyboard, one that I haven't seen since you can't look at a Dell in a retail store. So my plan (which ended up being quite expensive) was to get the lightweight Dell, but then get an external keyboard, mouse, monitor and dock that I could plug it in and out of. I had some final technical questions I couldn't answer online so I called the Dell number and ended up in a high-pressure sales situation that ended up with me buying everything on their no money down plan.

Flash forward about a week. The system arrives. I start setting it up. The keyboard is borderline ridiculous (for example, the period key, which, you know, you hit everytime you finish a sentence, is half size)- for some reason they don't use over a half inch of space on either side. Its difficult to place disks in the disk drive. The broadband cable requires a large amount of brute force to pull out once I've plugged it in.

Then I set up the monitor. I try plugging it in both ways- nothing but a test screen appears. I call Dell's service line, after 78 minutes on the phone with someone in India (much of that time holding) I get passed on to a second level guy (after a few more minutes of holding). During this time I also tried and failed to get my printer installed and printing correctly. 90 minutes and two Dell tech support people after I called, they're satisfied its a hardware problem. I say great, send me someone to fix it, since, you know, I spent a couple of hundred dollars on your #1 service plan which includes that. Oh, well they didn't know about that, I'd have to speak to a third person about that. At somepoint after the next few minutes of holding I got flat out disconnected.

When I called back, I just wanted to return everything and end the fiasco. That took 35 minutes. The experience came full circle when I ended up in another high pressure negotiation where I had to decline an offer to speak to a hardware expert and another offer to replace the whole system. When I told the woman that I had had enough and just wanted to return it, she told me I'd have to pay for the return shipping. I argued, saying why should I have to pay to ship back a product that didn't work. She said because I rejected their cure, which was a new system. I said, well, that would cure the defective product, but what would cure the horrendous service that I paid hundreds of dollars for? She said, and this shocked me even two hours in, that I "just didn't give it enough time." I wrote that down. I was given a return number to take to a UPS store, who would print return labels and ship the return boxes- at my expense. Naturally, even that was screwed up, as the number only covered two of the three boxes. I guess Dell figured I'd want to just keep the wireless keyboard and mouse and pretend I had a functioning Dell computer.

The happy ending here is that I am currently writing this post from my new Fujitsu Lifebook 6240 and I cannot sing its praises enough. The set up was completely smooth with the software and the externals (which unlike Dell, were not sold as a package). Like the Dell Inspiron 700m, the Fujitsu Lifebook 6240 is 4 pounds, but the keyboard is a decent size (slightly smaller than optimal, but good for a lightweight laptop). The screen is also bigger at 13.3 inches. So no external screen or keyboard necessary. Also, things that I had to pay extra for with Dell, like a weight-saving bay (the Dell saleswoman didn't even know what that was), or the back-up XP installation disk, came free with the Fujitsu. The Fujistu Lifebook is a few hundred dollars more, no doubt, but trust me, either way you get what you pay for.

P.S. As luck would have it, I used to live in the same building as the Dell dude, but he had to move out in search of lower rent after he lost his gig with Dell for his marijuana bust.

UPDATE 10/3/05: Called Dell to get the Return Authorization Number for that last box, it only took 26 minutes. Also, I forgot to mention that for some reason Dell didn't find it necessary to ship the computer or the monitor with a user manual. Great company.